Sunday, November 7, 2010

Going back in time

Emily asked me tonight whether I would redo anything in my life or do anything different. Generally I think these kind of questions are silly because all experiences make me who I am today for better or worse. But of course I HAVE to answer these questions for Emily and I could only come up with two things.

First, (since we were watching football) I would like to go back and play football with my mindset as of now. I played through 8th grade but quit to play tennis. I loved tennis so much and I would say I was very good, making Varsity as a freshman. But through high school I put an extreme amount of pressure on myself to play perfect and mentally, I couldn't handle it. Tennis is a true mental game. Out there by myself I would win the matches with my skills but lose the matches with my head.

Anyway, I would like to go back and play football where I left off. I played quarterback and safety and I wasn't too bad. My only hindrance is my small hands so I never had a really good grip on the ball. I just think if I got over my fear of getting hit I could have been pretty good. Also in basketball. My parents always said that if I stuck with basketball, by the time I was a senior I would start because everyone would quit the team. Sure enough everyone did and I could have played. Shooting hoops have become my stress relief the past few years. I know I'm not the greatest player ever, but to me it's relaxing. I may have been the most talented at tennis, but would I have been a lot happier in HS playing BB and football? I'll never know. But I think so.

Another thing I wouldn't have done is date my ex-girlfriend Alex. I learned a lot from a serious relationship that benefited my relationship with Emily, but I think the cons outweigh the pros in this case.

My freshman and sophomore years in college was such a depressing time for me. I started dating a girl who lived half way across the country. I had no friends for such a long time so naturally I would talk to her on the phone all. the. time. I look back at that period in my life and think about all the things I could have experienced. Really the only events that I can remember having fun my freshman year were the times my sister Tiffany would come to Lincoln (or vice versa) and we would go to concerts/dinner/church/just hang out. Tiffany was my best friend and I'll always love those opportunities I had with my sister. But walking back in that dorm room with a roommate I hated, with no friends, with a girlfriend so far away, I lost so much. My parents always asked me UNL turned into a all-male school and why the girls at UNL weren't good enough. I wish I had taken their advice. Well, eventually I did. Just at the right time to find the right girl.

All that aside, I had an amazing undergrad experience at UNL halfway through my sophomore year on. I lost the long distance relationship. I gained a dozen more friends, enjoyed life, lightened up, and met a really cute girl by the name of Emily. I loved going to school at UNL. I can't imagine going anywhere else. In a lot of ways it's still home to me. Emily and I still talk about living there again. I'm just sad I only got to really experience two years of it.
(fun crazies america)

So do you wish you could go back and redo something in particular?

1 comment:

tylerartz said...

I'm not the type to want to change my past either, because changing the past would inevitably change our present (and future). I think if I HAD to change something, I would have tried to travel more in college including more backpacking during the summer and actually taking at least one spring break off instead of going to Mexico for mission trips EVERY year.